5 Tips To Happiness-Attitude of Gratitude

Studies have shown that the best way to achieve happiness is to focus on gratitude. Happiness is actually the result of living in a state of gratitude. You're most happy when you understand things that you can be grateful for and appreciate all that is around you. It's not a destination, it's a place where you already exist. You already have so much that puts a smile on your face right now, but you just need to become aware of this condition, rather than constantly looking out onto the horizon.

Too many times you're only focusing on achieving the illusory concept of happiness. It feels like you're always chasing your dreams, like "I'll be happy when I have this much money" or "I'll be happy when I gain that position." The problem with that kind of thinking is you're always moving the goalposts, so it feels like you never actually get over the finish line. You may achieve the initial goal, but then you feel unsatisfied and always want more.

Since the practice of gratitude is such an important concept, I wanted to offer five ways to approach it and work on it. Some of these methods may work for you, while others may not. Choose those suggestions that resonate with you and ignore the others. You want to start practicing the methods that are more natural for you and can be worked with on a daily basis.

One of the first things you can do is look around you and think how truly fortunate you are for everything in your life. Create a list of people, pets and objects that make you feel blessed to know or have. Imagine how you would feel if all this was suddenly removed from your life. You can quickly see what's truly important in your life versus what's not terribly vital. This helps you gain some perspective. Then ask yourself these questions: 

• "What can I be grateful for in my life today?" 
• Who are three people I'm grateful to have in my life today?"

With the new perspective, you may be shocked at the size of your list. Do this daily and try to come up with different things.

As an example, some of the people in the poorest nations have some of the highest "happiness quotients." Why is this? They are more focused on their family, their food, their shoes, their shelter and their clothing. When you focus on the basic necessities and those you love, you truly begin to appreciate life and all it has to give. These people aren't focused on how they can have more, who has what, or why they didn't achieve something. They're grateful they have anything.

Looking outward is fine, but you should look inside yourself as well. What can you appreciate about yourself? What aspects of yourself do you feel gratitude towards? This not only helps your feeling of overall happiness, but it aids in improving your self-confidence and your self-esteem. Oftentimes, that which you find most valuable is hidden deep within. Consider what you find wonderful about yourself, and start inventorying these aspects. Ask yourself these questions:

• What are three things that I feel grateful for about myself?
• What aspects of myself am I most proud?
• What do I admire about myself the most and why?

Perhaps you're a wonderful friend or parent during a moment of crisis (we all could use that these days). Maybe you finally finished a big project you were working on. Possibly you feel proud that you've volunteered or offered your services to those in need or less fortunate. 

It could be as small as feeling good inside because you were able to put a smile on someone's face when you know they were having a difficult time. 

Feeling gratitude towards yourself doesn't have to focus on the big qualities or accomplishments. It's most often the smaller things that make a difference. Perhaps you're a good listener and enable people to just vent or get something off their chest. Certainly that quality is in short supply these days. Maybe your good mood or sense of humor gives people a lift when they need it most. 

Most people, when they search for things to be grateful for, consider big accomplishments or large possessions. They often think of the big house, the fancy car, the big bank account, or the high-profile job. In fact, not only are these items fleeting and actually less meaningful, but they can also keep you focused on the future. Perhaps you have the fancy car or the big house...but now you want a bigger house or a better car. The goalposts always seem to move and you're never fully satisfied. Consequently, you're never focused on the now, you're focused on the future. You're always reaching for the unattainable goal on the misty horizon.

Instead, appreciate what you already have. More than likely you completely ignore these items, and you take them for granted because they seem so insignificant. Start looking at what's in your life now. What little things can you feel grateful for that's already in your life? Ask yourself these questions:

• What can I be grateful for that I already have in my life today?
• What do I enjoy doing that I already do?
• What small things that I enjoy do I take for granted?
• How would I feel if these things were suddenly removed from my life?

Perhaps you enjoy a simple cup of coffee in the morning, but you don't think about it. Now start to appreciate it and feel grateful for that little daily cup of coffee. Think how wonderful you feel when you sip that delicious, hot coffee, with your fingers around the warm mug, the aroma in your nasal passages, and perhaps the delicate scenery around you as you gaze out the window and enjoy. See how just a simple cup of coffee can so easily be something to be grateful for? 

To help you focus on the little things, start writing in a gratitude journal. Every day, write down three small things that you can be grateful for that you have in your life now. They should put a smile on your face as you think about them and mentally experience them. Each day come up with three new items so that you're not repeating the same things all the time. Make this a fun exercise, because it shouldn't be seen as a chore. That defeats the purpose and makes it unsustainable.

It's important that you make the gratitude process a habit. Writing in your daily gratitude journal should be done at the same time every day. If you're a morning person, write things down in the morning. If you're more of a night owl, then write them down at night. Whatever you choose should be done according to a schedule that is consistent and something you can stick to. I find it's usually best to focus either on the morning or the evening. 

Otherwise, you may find that the practice isn't becoming ingrained as a habit, and you may find yourself abandoning it. There are a few good methods to consider:

• In the morning, get a good start to the day by taking a few minutes and writing down three small things in your life you are grateful right now. 
• In the evening, make a fine end to your day by journaling several small items you appreciate having in your life now. 
• Consider how blessed you are to have your health, your family, your friends, your food, your shelter, your natural surroundings, living in a peaceful existence, and more. Again imagine how you'd feel if you no longer had these things in your life.

While it's certainly nice to feel gratitude for what's in your life, the feeling is greatly magnified when you share your abundance and gratitude with those around you. Imagine how you would feel if you offered some of your food (for which you already have an oversupply) to a food pantry, a soup kitchen, or even a homeless man on the street. 

Consider the appreciation coming from the recipients, especially if you had a direct encounter with the homeless man and you displayed your loving kindness and generosity. While the act would certainly make you feel wonderful, the impact would be substantially greater for the man receiving your generosity. 

This is how you can pay forward your gratitude and appreciation. As you pay it forward, the recipients may also do likewise, creating a wonderful chain of events whereby many people are sharing their gratitude and loving-kindness. This additionally creates a large number of people who are experiencing a greater amount of happiness in their lives. 

Maybe you pay it forward with a smile or maybe it's a Thanksgiving meal for many people. Maybe it's even just an email or a short text. Regardless, it's the effect that counts and that has lasting beautiful consequences. Remember the saying, "What you think about you bring about." You can make a big impact on not only your own life but the life of many others. Share your gratitude.

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Tags: gratitude, happiness, appreciation, satisfaction, enjoy, altruism, sense of purpose, loving kindness, love, volunteering, living spiritually, god, great spirit, source